Cookies, Learning and Counselor Conversation
I was thrilled to have the opportunity to sit down with Counselor, Emily Willet. Emily is in private practice in downtown Spokane. The byline on her website sums up nicely both my experience of her and what I know she nurtures within a counseling relationships. It is: “Where Compassion Meets Understanding.”
I found my time with Emily to be easy-going, open, fun and depth engaging. Her authenticity, compassion and understanding and who she is at her very core is what I most value about her. She shared about her personal and professional learning and how her own experiences, both challenging and rewarding, created a path that led her to the work that she feels honored to do.
For this visit, I brought with me a healthy alternative chocolate cookie with an added Halloween themed twist (see recipe below).
Personal Learning
As I explored with Emily about the greatest learning for her personally, she shared about part of her story over a 10 year span and coming out as Bisexual. When she first disclosed her truth, she was a part of a large, Christian community and very involved. “I had a very strong faith in Jesus. I prayed every day.” When she disclosed, she describes being judged harshly by her church community and experiencing the message, “You don’t belong here.” This was a very painful time for her.
What created more of a challenge was that her mother is the pastor with a Christian denominational church. There was further dissonance with their relationship and a grappling with religious values. This all has had a lasting effect on Emily. She shared, “Later in college, “I had some other traumatic experiences. I was feeling that I was not a part of my social groups anymore because of it.”
These experiences caused her to seek healing, to explore her identity and to search for a sense of “belonging.” “When I came out, I had a counselor. I went to someone who was affirming of me, but did not really get it. There were lots of micro-aggression’s. It was not until I found a counselor that had lived an experience of being queer. She spoke of the shifts that were able to happen for her with this.” Emily’s advice from this experience: “Talk to someone who gets it – I have come out of the closet too. I have had religious trauma. I get it. I have chosen never to hide again because of the shame that I feel whenever I am hiding.”
“What most people come to see me for is my LGBT specialty. I am very open about being bisexual and I have been out for 10 years. I have had to live with that and my estrangement with my community. I get it on a personal level what that is like.”
Emily also shared that through her own journey, the relationship with her mother has come full circle. She is proud about the shifts that are happening and that there is mending happening between them. “She can be an advocate for the LGBTQ clients and people in her congregation and let them know that they are accepted and loved.”
“Through it all, “There is a beautiful subculture that I am proud to be a part of it. It helped me to look out of my hetero-normative box and open my world view to different ways to live. I know how it feels to be on the other side. For me, it is the reason I am here
Professional Learning
“I feel that my first jobs out of grad school at Frontier and Cornerstone Cottage taught me about complex trauma and what it’s like to live in a different system. They exposed me to people that I would never have been exposed to and subcultures, like the homeless and the chronic mental ill.”
Emily shared that going into her clients homes to provide services was especially relevant to her learning. “I have a glimpse of what it is like to live in a traumatic home. I think it prepared me to work with people in an outpatient setting that other people would refer out for. With inpatient, they are in crisis. I was there for them, but I helped them get through a rough time. Now (in outpatient practice), I feel that I am there to be able to guide them through their process of being ready to actually open up and heal and make their own movement on things. I am more a guide or witness to it. I find a lot of times, people just need a little push or tweak in their thinking and then they can find their own way.
Of her relating with clients: “I sit where you sit once a week. I have my own counselor. I am not better than you. I get it. I am honored every time a client is vulnerable and shares something hard. It is not easy to do that.”
My Take-Away
I feel that Emily’s story inspires so much in her telling of it. What I will say as I sit back and think about my learning is that, honestly, tears come to my eyes. Not tears of sadness. It is a warmth and pride with Emily. Of being inspired and touched by her story. One of overcoming and her willingness to make a difference. And with her modeling of vulnerability, acceptance, healing and hope. And with it all, meeting people where they are at with a grace and compassion that is insurmountable.
I am beyond grateful for the experience of getting to sit and get to know Emily better and to learn from her. My life is better for it, my practice with clients inspired further, and she reminds me of the deep need for us to be a kinder world that welcomes diversity and belonging.
The Cookies
Emily shared with me that her favorite ingredient in a cookie was chocolate. She also needed healthy alternatives for her diet that includes being gluten-free, with no nuts or dried fruit (with the exception of raisins), but with no sweeteners, sorbitol, high fructose corn syrup, honey or agave. I set out in search of a recipe that could fit the bill for all of this. I found this recipe for chocolate cookies and made a few tweaks for some of the ingredients. I did add coconut and also used dark chocolate chips only (that did not have any sweeteners). I also shaped these into pumpkins with some sprinkles to make them Halloween themed.
These cookies were ooey, gooey and were brownie-like in flavor and texture. They were very rich with chocolate. I was hoping that Emily would like them and was delighted when she not only did, but ate them so quickly that she did not get time to take a picture of herself holding them for this blog, since I forgot to do this when I visited. The recipe can be found through this link:
https://deliciouslittlebites.com/gluten-free-triple-chocolate/
About Emily Willet’s Counseling Practice
Where Compassion Meets Understanding
Emily Willet, MA, LMHC, LPC
905 W Riverside Ave, Ste 214
Spokane, WA 99201
Contact:
(509) 290-1525
emilygwillet@gmail.com
Emily works with clients of all backgrounds with a specialty in working with LGBTQ+ Identity issues. Additionally, she is trained in working with a variety of other life challenges, including ADHD, developmental and complex trauma, attachment problems, anxiety, depression, autism, and psychotic disorders.
